Bwahahahahahahahahahaha
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Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. OK, we get it. Haha. We're talking about vampires. I know a few people who are obsessed with vampires. I think they're cool, too. Everybody knows Dracula. Bram Stoker. It kind of made this whole thing about vampire hunting. It inspired Buffy, who inspired Duffy, who inspired Mercy. Anyhow...
And here it is, the newest vampire 'thing'. Twilight. It's unique. Vampire romance. Yup. Who's fall in love with Dracula of Varney I don't know, but somebody fell in love with one called Edward. He's one hundred and seventeen. And somebody named Bella Cullen, who I think is about nineteen and faints at the site of blood, fell in love with him. So? Why don't they get married. He'll live longer blah blah blah, happily ever after. No. It's not that simple. She has to become a vampire, and leave everything and everyone behind. OK, if I'm completely off, I haven't read them, so don't blame me. It was just random episodes of Imprint that I picked this up from. There's some bloke named Jacob, too.
So, this is what they're making a fuss over. Any other vampires? Buffy the Vampire Slayer. That's getting old now. Lost it's hype. Sky is being taken over by lyrics programmes, 10-year-olds and Family Guys. Dracula is still there. People are still watching the horror movie, reading the classic, re-reading the classic, re-reading the classic again, re-reading a hundred times, re-watching a hundred times, re-reading re-tellings which will never compare to the actual classic by Bram Stoker itself, writing re-reads, and the rest of it.
Then there's Varney the Vampire of the Feast of Blood, another classic. It doesn't get any glory. It's the oldest, and now it's being retold by the author of the original novel Sweeney Todd.
The funny thing about vampires is that they don't appear in folklore or legend or myth. They're just in stories and books. of course, this is Ireland, so our folklore is mainly leprechauns and banshees. And we know bit about the Loch Ness Monster and that. So, in Transylvania, maybe vampires were their versions of leprechauns. Or were they their versions of witches in England? Did people kill eachother for them being vampires? Vlad Tepés, of course but he was Dracula, not vampires in general.
He stuck spears through his dinner guest's hearts. And they took stakes to dinner for him (get it? Stakes?) The sad thing is that nowadays, nobody's afraid of vampires. You may lie in your bed and have nightmares about ghosts. But vampires nowadays are just silly little fairytales. After all, it is nice to be scared sometimes. Although people don't think so. I do. Witches are cool. Aliens exist. To be honest, I'm very superstitious. The Little Vampire is one of those books with a good plot and isn't scary at all )-: